Puff

I was walking through Le Mart de Wal last week, and was actually disturbed by something other than what normally disturbs me in a Le Mart de Wal.  On the end of the single aisle of plastic beads and BeDazzlers that passes for the Crafts Department, I saw a bag of brown pipe cleaners, labelled as… “Fuzzy Sticks.”

That’s not a crafting supply.  That’s the title of a particularly alarming furry fanfic.  I’m assuming the name change has come about because less people are smoking, and Kids These Days What With Their Hannah Dakota and Their Light-Up Sneakers have barely a concept of pipedom.  Well, whooooo, I suppose.  I cannot abide cigarettes, but am rather partial to pipes, probably because my father smoked one when I was a little blonde, just starting out in the world of not understanding anything.  A bit of brown secondhand stickiness was a proper fee for the Captain Smith tins which housed our collection of My Little Pony combs.  The modern equivalent, I suppose, is handing  my Hypnotiq empties over to Will The Smaller Child Nephew as a secondhand sippy cup.

My primary fear is that pipe cleaners will vanish from the Earth entirely– and then what will we do for candy cane reindeer antlers?  I’M ASKING YOU.

next, they come for the clothespins at:  mbe@drinktothelasses.com